What am I doing wrong?.. Why can’t I be good enough for you. You’re all I want, exactly the way you are. I love your arms, I love your face, I love your dick, I love your feet and your teeth and your fingers and your hair and your freckles and your eyes and your back and your legs and your stomach and your neck and your bum and your ears and your lips. I love your smile and your laugh and your voice and your insecurities and how jealous you are and the way you talk to yourself and how much you smoke and drink and that you’re so strong physically and emotionally. I love how you care what I think and how you like to keep me on the inside of the sidewalk and how you live and breathe Naruto, I love that you don’t treat me like I’m breakable and that you make me feel beautiful and you make me feel important and that you support everything I do and that you’re real and honest and you’re helping me be a better person. I love that you throw me around when we’re making out and that my ass is your best friend and that you like that I’m weird and that you’re weird too. I love that you’re all I ever think about and that you think about me when I’m not around. I love that you’re the perfect height for me, for how short I am, that you’re tall enough that I have to stand on my toes to kiss you but not so tall that I can’t kiss you unless you bend over. I love that you squat down a little when you kiss me so I don’t have to be on my toes. I love the brown fleck in your eye and the one freckle on each ear and the gap between your front teeth and the way your veins stick out a little and the scar in your eyebrow, I love your tongue and how easy it is to give you hickeys, I love the way you taste and how safe I feel in your arms and how perfectly my hand fits in yours. I love how fucking smart you are and that you make my cheeks cramp from smiling. I love that you willingly watched The Land Before Time with me, I didn’t even have to ask. I love that there are so many things to love about you and that every time I’m with you I find more. But because of all these things I don’t feel good enough for you.. I’m not pretty enough for you, I’m not skinny enough or funny enough or smart enough. My past isn’t good enough, you deserve someone who hasn’t done the things I have. You deserve someone that you have no reason to doubt or worry about. You deserve someone who isn’t a total mess, someone who doesn’t have to be fixed. You deserve someone you can trust, someone who doesn’t need second chances. Who doesn’t subconsciously evade the most important questions, who never says the wrong thing, who isn’t afraid of commitment. I love how much effort I have to put into this to be with you because it makes me know this will last. But at the same time, I’m so scared that my everything won’t be enough and that you’ll still have a reason to leave. I don’t want to lose you. I’m scared of fucking this up like I do with everything else, like I almost did already.. I’m just so scared.

I’m not okay anymore. I thought I was but I’m not and I’m scared and I can’t tell anyone because they all think I’m better. I don’t want to be like this again.

What did I get myself into now..

dignitea:

my life is a joke and i’m not laughing anymore

compliment:

do you ever want to sleep for 14 years without waking up

I’m actually the shittiest girlfriend. I almost wish I wasn’t even in a relationship anymore. Nt because I don’t love him, I do, but because it’s just too hard. It’s too hard to be a girlfriend when you don’t even want to be a person.